We all want to be happy. Every living being that exists wants to be happy in their own way. Some of us don't know where to find happiness. Some of us have been misled as to how to achieve happiness. Many of us do things to make ourselves happy that actually have the opposite effect without even realizing it. Most of us work constantly to attain happiness.
The basic problem is that we mistakenly believe that if we fulfill all of our desires we will finally be truly happy. In reality, the opposite is true. If you can stop chasing your fleeting desires you will be happier. Our desires as humans on this planet at this time are never ending. We live in what is known as the Desire Realm. No matter how many desires you achieve, you will always have more and more. You will never truly satisfy all of your desires. You will never get to that place in your life where you will finally have everything perfect. No one has. No one has fulfilled every single desire in life and is sitting in contentment with nothing more to do. Eventually they will grow bored or hungry and want something else.
Stop. Stop chasing after things that will never bring you lasting happiness anyway. There is nothing you can buy that will give that to you. There is nothing you can possess that will give that to you. The commercials lie to you when they tell you that you have to buy their product in order to be happy. The people telling you to buy their products or services, think they need to make lots of money off of you in order to be happy, so they will sell you anything to make you spend your money. Only, you won't be happy from buying that thing and they won't be happy with the money they get. Sadly, everyone thinks they need more things to get happy or more money to get that happiness they seek.
If anything you were to buy would give you lasting happiness you would only ever have to buy that one thing. Think about it. If there was an object like that, you would only need one of them because you would have perfect happiness. Owning two or more would not give you more happiness because you would already be perfectly content by having just one. Let's say that buying a brand new car would give you perfect happiness. The moment you sat in the car you would be completely blissed out. You would never get out of that car because the moment you got out, your happiness would end. You would sit in that car until you died. You wouldn't even want to leave the car to go to the washroom because you wouldn't want to lose your happiness. Your happiness would come from that car. That car would give you happiness. No object has ever been invented that does that.
Your happiness is not given to you from the object. There is no item that exists that gives you happiness. Sure you might be happy with the fact that you bought the item and it might make you happy to own it for a brief period of time, but that happiness fades. The item will break, get lost or stolen or be consumed and then you will think that you need to find something new to make you happy again. The item itself does not make you happy. You are choosing to be happy and thinking that happiness is coming from the item. It doesn't matter how many items you buy, you won't achieve lasting happiness from any of them or all of them together. That car for instance, will break down, rust, fall apart, need repairs and cost you a lot of money. If you never left the car it would get pretty dirty, smelly and disgusting in there. Any happiness you create associated with that car will fade and be lost.
How can you know that the item does not give you happiness? If an item truly gave happiness then everyone would feel happy when they came into contact with that item. There isn't one item that exists that makes everyone happy. Take your most favourite thing for example, can you think of anyone that doesn't like it? If anyone exists that does not like your favourite thing, then that thing is not giving happiness. You have chosen that item to be your favourite thing for whatever reasons and you choose to be happy with that item. You are creating the happiness you feel and associating it with that item, so mistakenly think it is the item that is creating your happiness. It can't. That favourite item of yours may eventually lose it's appeal and you may move on to preferring something else instead.
If one item cannot give you happiness, then how could owning many items that do not give happiness, give you happiness? They can't. Filling your home and you storage unit with a large number of items does not give you happiness. You are wasting your money. You are filling your home with items that you don't need and that won't give you happiness. You are filling your storage unit with items that not only don't give you happiness, but that you don't even use anymore. Why are you hanging on to them? Even if you choose to be happy with certain items, that happiness you create is only temporary. Even if the item remains in perfect condition and is never lost or stolen, you will have to part with it when you eventually die. Any happiness you associate with that item, will be lost.
It is not just items that do not give us happiness. Nothing gives us happiness, but rather we choose to be happy. We make the mistake of thinking that an item, a person, a place or whatever makes us happy. They don't. We decide to be happy with the item, the person and so on. It is the same when we decide to feel unhappiness with anything. We are making the choice to feel the way we feel and nothing and no one can do that to us. We decide we like someone and to feel happy around them because of the way they behave or they way they think or we decide to dislike and hate someone for the same reasons. The person themselves do not make us happy or miserable, they do not have that kind of power over us. It is our response to them, it is our choice on how to feel.
You may think that if someone were to mistreat you, you would automatically hate them, but that is not true. If someone you love deeply were to mistreat you, you may not hate them at all. If your young child that you love were to mistreat you because they do not know any better or have not learned that behaviour is not acceptable, you most likely would not hate them. You may realize it was a mistake or an accident and forgive them and continue to love them. The way other people behave does not dictate how you feel. You choose to feel certain ways around certain people. You have the power to choose how to feel in every situation you find yourself in.
No relationship you ever have will make you live happily ever after. There will always be problems, arguments and disappointments that arise. No relationship is absolutely perfect. Even if a couple seems blissfully happy out in public, they could live in hell at home. Everyone has difficulties.
Trying to find happiness somewhere out there in the world is a complete waste of your time, your energy and your money. The happiness you are seeking is right there within you. You just have to choose to feel that way, whenever you want to be happy. You will never get your life perfect and get everything you desire in life perfect, so if you think you need to obtain a perfect life before you can be happy you will die without ever having achieved that. If you truly want to be happy, then you need to work on creating that feeling within yourself no matter what circumstances you find yourself in. Whether you are rich or poor, healthy or unhealthy, young or old, it doesn't matter, you can create happiness for yourself. Just choose to be happy.
Accept your life as it is and work on being content with what you have. You decide whether to be okay with your life as it is and to be happy or to be miserable trying to fill your life with things that won't bring you the happiness you seek anyway. Happiness is an emotion, like love, hate or anger. You choose what to be happy about, so choose to be happy right now with yourself exactly as you are and with your life exactly as it is. With all the problems and issues that you have piled up around you, you can still choose to be happy. They will all eventually be resolved for better or for worse and no matter what the outcome is you can be content. It is your karma that is creating your circumstances, so you can choose to be unhappy or happy about it.
It can be difficult if we are familiar with misery, but we can make the changes necessary to improve our moods and automatic responses. Give yourself the time it takes to get control over your emotions. Work on disciplining your mind and overcoming your ego, so that you can find the lasting peace and happiness you seek. Stop looking for these things outside of yourself, for they do not exist out there anywhere. The longer you focus your attention outwards, the longer it will take you to find real peace and happiness. Why not spend that time and focus inwards to make the changes that you need to benefit yourself? You have the rest of your life to work towards achieving this. Find happiness within for that is the only place you will truly find it.
The link to listen to the podcast is here: https://youtu.be/oWeyh_bklN4
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